Never Enough
- Eric Crowley
- Aug 24, 2018
- 8 min read
Hello again! I can’t believe so much time has passed since I last wrote to update you all. My last blog was in May! My failure to update was not do to a lack of activity; we’ve been busy with missions and developing several new programs for this year. We led two summer camps, one for our boys youth group, and one for the girls. And I and four other missionaries went to New York for a Missionary Formation Week with our ministry, and a nice visit with my family back in Pennsylvania.
After going back to the States for the first time since my arrival in the Philippines last year, I was able to reflect on the differences between the two cultures. So here are some of my realizations:
FOOD
Filipinos eat rice with every meal. Yes, even breakfast. When I got back to the Philippines, everyone was asking me: "Did you miss rice?” I had to answer honestly: “Well, no, not really.” You see, for Filipinos, a meal without rice is not really a meal at all. It’s more of a snack. They actually marvel at the fact that you can get full without rice. But the fact that I gained almost 10 pounds while back in the States is proof enough that, yes, you can indeed get full without rice!
BEACHES
I’ve almost started to take for granted the crystal clear waters of the Philippines, with shades of blue that you might believe only exist in computer-edited postcards. Being back in the US, I was reminded that in most bodies of water, you can’t even see your own feet if they’re more than 3 inches under the water. And in the Philippines, all the fun begins under the water: colorful coral reefs, dozens of species of fish, even sea horses and whale sharks! There’s not much to see in the States, other than the occasional jellyfish or killer shark, both of which I’d prefer to stay away from…
TRAFFIC
You think New York traffic is bad? Come to Cebu City. Times Square will seem like a Nascar track in comparison. I was delighted to drive on the open highways of the States. If I ever hit 50mph in Cebu (a very rare occurence) I feel like I’m getting ready for liftoff!
THE SUN
I forgot that it is possible to be in the sun and not be absolutely dripping with sweat. It was a delightful surprise to return to the States to the beautiful 70 degree weather, and to bask in the sun without dying of heatstroke.
RELIGIOSITY
I was struck by the stark difference in the public displays of religiosity in the Philippines vs. the US. Back in the States, religion is more of a private affair, with few outward expressions seen outside of church on Sundays. Here in the Philippines, you can’t escape it! There are Santo Niños (the baby Jesus, who is the patron of Cebu) in every establishment, home, school…you name it. While riding the jeepneys (public transportation), people cross themselves when passing a church. At noon, 3pm, and 6pm in the malls and grocery stores, everything literally stops - the cashiers step back from their registers, all the shoppers stop in their tracks - and the Angelus or the Divine Mercy prayers are prayed over loudspeakers. Then after a minute, everyone resumes their busy lives again.
People here genuinely love their faith. Just the other day I was attending a Mass in a public park at night. An 11-year old kid who lives on the streets, who I befriended months ago, happened to be passing by, and he ran over to say hi. He asked if there was going to be Mass, and when I told him yes, he was so excited and asked if he could stay. Even though he doesn’t understand English, he attentively and joyfully sat through the whole Mass, and even eagerly asked me at the end if they have this Mass every day.
POVERTY
Another striking experience was to be reminded of the poverty in the Philippines. It's easy to get used to it. I meet many homeless families, or families who live in a small shack with only one room, but who somehow maintain a deep inner joy. Although many have a rough exterior, if you share a smile with them, immediately a broad, easy smile is given back to you in return.
So, what is poverty? We hear so much about the attempts to eradicate poverty in our world. Now, of course we should help people be able to support themselves and to live a dignified life. But if we do it at the expense of their humanity, are we really helping anyone?
Let’s turn to St. Mother Teresa to teach us something about poverty:
“We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty."
"The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.”
This poverty exists in all of us, “rich” and “poor” alike. We are all seeking to be known, to be loved.
I volunteer with the Missionaries of the Poor, a group of religious men who take care of handicapped orphans who have been abandoned by their families. When I went there for the first time, I met a kid named Gary. I tried everything to try to get a smile from him: I talked to him, sang songs, did little dances…..nothing. He wouldn’t give me the light of day. I actually thought that he wasn’t physically able to talk. The very next time I came back, one week later, Gary was there in the doorway. As I walked in he looked up, came right over to me, and began talking my ear off. He took me around showing me pictures of all the brothers and all the kids who live in the center, telling their names over and over again. He couldn’t express very much, and he even called some of the brothers “Kuya Jesus” (which means “big brother Jesus”) and even “Kuya Mary” (big brother Mary!), but it didn’t matter.
To some, Gary might seem like the poorest of the poor. He is handicapped, has no money or family, and lives in an orphanage. But Gary is rich, because he loves. He knows that he has brothers who love for him and spend their life to make sure he is cared for. This is why, although suspicious on our first meeting, he was able to open up and show so much love. He has been wounded, but he still has great love in his heart.
Another friend I have made is a man named Kuya Atoy. He is a handicapped man, bound to a wheelchair, who spends his days in front of the church I go to every day. He constantly amazes me with his joy: He calls me Eric Clapton, and he always sings songs by different American bands, belting them out at the top of his voice.
I recently commented on his shoes - I asked him if they were new. And he said, “These are a blessing! A gift! Someone gave these to me. And you see this hat? Another blessing! So many blessings!” Only a heart full of love can have eyes keen enough to see all the blessings.
Kuya Atoy got pretty sick a few weeks ago. He looked terrible and had no energy, and he had no money for a doctor. But he wasn’t phased. “It’s ok…If it’s my time to go to Jesus, I am ready. You see these legs? I can’t use them here, but soon I’ll be running and dancing! I’ll finally be able to use these shoes!” True love casts out all fear - even the fear of death. I think this "poor" man is richer than he knows.
With so many differences between the cultures of the world, is there something that unites us at the most basic level? If not, then tension, racism, wars, and building walls on borders are inevitable. In the midst of all the differences, what unites us?
Our need for love, and our desire to be loved.
While I was home, I saw the musical “The Greatest Showman.” One of the songs from that movie has been stuck in my head for weeks! I’ve been reflecting on the words of the chorus:
All the shine of a thousand spotlights
All the stars we steal from the night sky
Will never be enough
Never be enough
Towers of gold are still too little
These hands could hold the world but it'll
Never be enough
Never be enough
For me
This is what unites us all as persons, whether we are from the US or the Philippines; whether we are rich or poor; whether we are from a loving family or are an abandoned orphan - the depths of every human heart cries out these words: Nothing is enough, but love alone!
As St. John Paul II once said: “Happiness is being rooted in love.” Why is this? Every single person desires happiness. Everything we do, choose, and say is because, on some level, we are seeking happiness. We were created for happiness. It is our purpose. But how do we reach it? By love. Love is the way, the path, to happiness. If we love, we will be happy. If we choose “to live the present moment, filling it to the brim with love” (Cardinal François-Xavier Nguyên van Thuân), we will find our purpose, our fulfillment.
For we were created by Love, for love. This is why love alone suffices. This is true for myself and for every other person. For this reason, “the only proper response to a person is love” (St. John Paul II). Let’s think about that: The only proper response to a person is love. So all the ways that we can tend to treat others - with judgment, impatience, as objects or a means to an end, etc - disrespect the person because they are not in line with the great dignity that we have as creatures created for love.
St. John Vianney tells us that, “Our glorious duty is to pray and to love. If you pray and love, that is where happiness lies.” We pray first, because this unites us to the Source of Love, the One who is Love. And then we go forth and treat others with love.
“Where there is no love, put love - and you will find love” (St. John of the Cross). Our world is filled with violence, war, and division. But we are not called to change the world. We are called to find those places in our own lives where there is no love, and put love, so that there will be love.
And when we do this, we find happiness.
Love: This is what unites us; what goes deeper than all that divides us. But love is not just some vague feeling or emotion. Love goes deeper than like. I am not called to like everyone, but I am called to love everyone. Love is the decision to see each person as someone with infinite worth, someone who, just like me, needs to love and to be loved. No matter if they are a handicapped orphan or a successful businessman; no matter what they have done or failed to do - to choose to honor their dignity as a person, because this dignity can never be lost.
So whether we eat rice at every meal, or never touch the stuff; whether we're swimming in clear or murky water; whether we're stuck in traffic or flying down the highway; let’s all go out there today and love. For as St. Paul says, “[If I] have not love, I am nothing” (1 Cor. 13:2).
I’ll leave you with another challenge from St. Mother Teresa:
"There is a terrible hunger for love. We all experience that in our lives - the pain, the loneliness. We must have the courage to recognize it. The poor you may have right in your own family: Find them. Love them."
Please pray for our upcoming missions:
Aug. 26 - Mary Our Help Technical Institute for Women
Sept. 1 - Youth for Christ Retreat
Sept. 8 - Formation for Enfants de Mekong students
Sept. 12 - Retreat for University of San Carlos students
Sept. 15 - Formation for Enfants de Mekong students
Sept. 16 - Chiara Luce girls youth group
Sept. 19 - Retreat for University of San Carlos students
Sept. 22 - Formation for Enfants de Mekong students
Oct. 5 - Retreat for SKILLS Training Center students
Oct. 12-14 - Missionary Formation Program
Oct. 21-22 - Youtube channel filming
Oct. 26-28 - Pure Heart Silent Retreat
We will talk to a total of approximately 700 youth on these missions, not counting our Youtube channel filming, which will reach many more! Please keep us in your prayers!
Check out some pictures of various missions over the last few months:
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